Happiness Is A Skill

Happiness is a skill and it seems that animals know better than humans what it is. Strange, isn’t it?

I think we may have the location of happiness in the wrong place. I think we have located it in our heads and that is why most people are not happy.

Happiness depends on the way we define it. Often it seems to be more of a social event than a personal one. It’s as if we are all living in a world designed like an arena, and we are trying to duke it out, beating each other at something.  Happiness is not about keeping score. Given that we are all part of one universal energy, there is no score to keep.

The only way to have happiness is to let go of comparisons, score keeping and competition. The easiest way to do so is to think of yourself as part of the larger evolution of the human race.

So what skills do you need to be happy?

  • Drop the scorecard; your life is not a product or a trophy.  With all due respect to the idea of living your best life, which is a good idea, what that means may not be materialistic.
  • It’s best if you can be you not someone else. Your unique gifts and energy that you bring to the table are enough.  It’s enough to do your best and be happy with that.
  • Engage with each moment on its terms.  To do so eliminates the use of force and demands, and lets life flower.  Life is not meant to be a cage we construct.
  • Practice letting go all of the time.  It is the only path to your freedom and creativity which are boundless.
  • Look for the good everywhere and you may find more than you realize. Wag your tail a lot.
  • Learn meditation and/or other energy healing techniques to make it easier to find your inner happiness.

Learn the difference between surrender and submission.  They are very different energies.

  • Submission is present in negative generalizations and fixed ideas about how life “should” be and everyone and everything in it. It is a defensive energy. Submission means that other people define you – usually though some roles or societal expectations that have nothing to do with your gifts or potential. Submission has the energy of giving up in advance. It is a distrusting and stingy energy.
  • Surrender has the energy of engagement and openness.  It is the combination of wonder, humility, presence and compassion.  It is a quality of being with – others and the universe rather than against. Therefore, it has be feeling of going with the flow. Surrender has a generous quality because it sees generosity. Surrender offers us a natural path to trust and self-trust.

It’s OK to be one human among 7 billion and be good with that.  It is OK to be a good and decent human being and be happy with yourself.  It is OK to enjoy life in simple ways and not feel cheated.  It is OK to be happy to be here without having anything to prove.

About Maria Hill

Maria Hill is the founder of Sensitive Evolution. She is the author of The Emerging Sensitive: A Guide For Finding Your Place In The World. In addition, she has created the immersive Emerging Sensitive Program using cultural and personal development frameworks to help sensitive people master their sensitivity and turn it into the asset it can be. She also offers The Magic Of Joy program for quantum healing and the Emerging Sensitive Community focused on living in the world as a sensitive person and navigating the challenging cultural shifts of our times. She is a longtime meditator, reiki master, student of alternative health and Ayurveda. Maria is a Certified Theta Healer and certified in Spiral Dynamics. She is an abstract painter whose portfolio can be found at Infinite Shape and also very interested in animal and human rights and the environment.


  1. Margo Nielson on July 19, 2016 at 9:47 am

    Hi Maria,
    Nice article. Wouldn’t our world be a happier place if we cultivated these skills in our own lives?


  2. Heidi Bertels on July 12, 2019 at 8:44 am

    I like the last paragraph. “It’s ok . . . ”
    All my life I’ve felt like there should be more. As a young kid I heard Peggy Lee sing that song about – “if that’s all there is . . . ” It has haunted me all my life.
    I like the reassurance you give us.
    At 64 yrs old – I am just now learning to direct my thoughts in a different direction.

    • Maria Hill on July 12, 2019 at 8:47 am

      So often we are pushed into competing and feeling bad with ourselves if we are not always trying to win at something. So it really is OK to be about simple joys. I hope you find many.